Well, you think "it's cool" you think that no one will be worse for wear
Music and Lyrics by Frederick George Moore
Copyright © 1991
Demophonic Music Publishing BMI
Used with permission
While your old
boyfriend played the Scottish flute
at the Orange County Fair
And as for me, I played "the Knight" dressed in my coat of mail
I dove off the highboy as Superman in an attempt to make you wail
Do you remember the
time you threw out the lamp
'cause the finial was arabesque?
Or the time the clock temporarily stopped?
You said "a sundial would be best"
Well your vicuna coat and periwinkle shoes are all you left behind
You took the soap-on-a-rope and the tam o'
I believe you know they're mine
Hey! You better stop! and think it over. Who are you trying to fool?
You better stop PLAYING ACTRESS, acting like you're so cool.
Well your dew-lap neck and airedale eyes never left me too much hope
That this "thing" we had ever could survive without a gyroscope
And isn't it sad that your accordion thighs are swelling up again?
I guess your atomizer and your barbell trainer won't save you in
Wasn't it you and some of your friends who tried to play Lacrosse?
While I sat there like a buddha and played your albatross
I played the lute in a sharkskin suit while you danced just like a worm gear
Who could have guess this toboggan ride could last another year?
You better stop! and think it over. Who are you trying to fool?
You better stop PLAYING ACTRESS, playing like you're so cool.
You better stop PLAYING ACTRESS,
You better stop PLAYING ACTRESS, etc....
NOTE: The lyrics for
the verses were given an alternate setting in the song YOU WANT IT